It is funny to me how much of an impact a single comment can have on your thoughts. What a perfect reminder to be aware of what words I speak to others in a simple interaction. It may stick with them for days, weeks, or even years. What is this conversation that grabbed my attention and made it impossible to think of anything else? And even made me consider changing my whole life plan and following a new dream?
I went to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription on Monday. Here is the conversation that ensued between me and one of the pharmacy technicians:
P: What are you doing these days? Are you still in school?
Me: I am working full time at (XYZ company).
P: Are you going to go back to school?
Me: I graduated about a year ago with a degree in English, I am not sure whether I will go back to school in the future or not!
P: Wow, weren’t you going to go to medical school in Florida?
“You used to have such BIG dreams!”
HOLD IT. STOP.
I fully recognize that this was not a malicious or cruel comment in any way. This employee is kind, intelligent, and thoughtful enough to have remembered what I had wanted to do with my life IN ADDITION TO everything going on in their own personal life! What they said was not directed to hurt me. But it did make me ponder a few things…
What am I doing with my life? Are my dreams big enough? Did I short-change myself by not going to medical school? Did I fail? Do I have the courage to do everything differently? Am I happy with where my life is taking me?
My life is not exactly how I expected it to be as I approach 25 years of breathing. I am still single. No, I don’t have kids to ruin in my own particular fashion. It hasn’t been possible to purchase a home in the suburbs (or anywhere for that matter!) with a single income. But one thing I realized from this conversation is certain.
My dreams have been altered. Reformed. Designed for a greater purpose.
What happened to my big dreams? Guess what?! I had a new dream. I changed my mind.
Because I am allowed to do that…and so are you
The realization I have come across over the last couple of days has changed my perspective completely. As I considered my life and how it has ended up so far, I have found the following: I still want to be a doctor. I want to heal the pains, sickness, hurt, cuts, bruises, and broken hearts of others. My dream is still big and a bit intimidating, but it doesn’t require years of schooling. (Although a handbook or instruction manual would be AMAZING!!) I want to be a mother. There is nothing greater than this single most important calling in life in my opinion. Maybe I won’t have children of my own during my time on earth, but I can bless and mend the hearts and struggles of those around me until I do. I can love the way Jesus Christ loved.
Unconditionally.
“If you continue to live as you are living, will the blessings promised in your patriarchal blessing be fulfilled?” -Carlos A. Godoy of the Seventy (The Lord has a plan for us! October 2014, LDS General Conference)
So…what is my point?! If you don’t feel that your dreams are custom-fit to your deepest inner desires, be brave enough to step back and change them. Live in a manner that will allow all of the blessings you deserve to be poured on you like the Ice-Bucket Challenge…and then be able to “tag” those you love by sharing your abilities and blessings to get some blessings dumped on them as well! Never let another person’s opinion of your ambitions keep you from being who your Heavenly Father has designed you to become.
This is not a call-out to everyone who wants to do other things. I would LOVE to be a doctor, but since I literally hate chemistry so much I could cry (OK so I cried a lot during those classes, haha you busted me….), this is not something I can be successful at with my circumstances.
But how can you change everything you want to do and be okay with the way people will probably judge or question your decisions?
Visualize Your End Goal
Whether you are like me and want to become a mom and make a difference in your future children’s lives or want to live on your own private island in the Caribbean, I want you to know first: ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.
Visualize yourself living there on the island, and picture who will be around you on your amazing private island. Figure out what kind of food you will be eating, and how your tan will look in that adorable white dress you got last week. Make it feel so real that the excitement courses through your veins and you can taste the fruity drink you have by the edge of the beach.
Make a Game Plan
A goal without a plan is only a dream. You need to start recognizing the things that need to happen to get you to the place you want to be. Want to be a doctor? Start studying! Find a scholarship that will allow you to be in school without having to work 60 hour weeks like I did. Set up the plan and make sure it has actionable steps that can be done and digested in tiny little pieces.
You are making a change for your future. Be realistic, set goals that can be achieved, and get ready for the ride of your life. It won’t all be easy, but the end result will be worth it because we only get one life – why would you waste it doing something you aren’t absolutely passionate and in love with?
Start Making Changes
Time for the hard work. Get busy! Start changing things around and do all of the little projects bit by bit so that you are closer and closer to your end result. I am working hard to create financial security for myself so that when I have kids, I can give them the best life possible. I am also working to be the best version of myself possible so that when I find the right guy, I will be ready for him. You may need to start saving up for your island, or studying for medical school. Whatever it is, just start working hard.
Because you are worth the end result and a lifetime of happiness. So go get it!
XO – Heather
Want more ideas to help design the life you want?
For When Your Goals Are Too Big
